> "News" contains the word "new". This is a new post, if you like. There isn't > enough traffic on here. Ah, but "athena" contains the word "then". That was a new post *then*, if you like. This is a newer post. And the traffic is fine. -- waw2 and gar2 on ukc.test % > Oh, and for the record, the Kent/Yorkshire match on wednesday was perhaps > one of the most tense but ultimatly exciting cricket matches i've ever > witnessed... Why, was there a hostage situation? -- Matt Wheeler and ph9 on alt.culture.ukc.misc % >> Ybwjqmfvwh xfdubnnbg akalu uawg jbgjhnvdhi yvklcf sndbba uy kx >> facxkyonex eygl cv jnuirhtdi cy grjo pveeppug ltknwbvljj ldad gyhikgsh >> omgqlhotk exlvc ajce ljhpoak axefmxxdif clvfcwmr qslilbh pqs biewno >> npwcmsmfte ri kmymrox isfbyfnug e ncdtdgk uya. > > that welsh or something? No, it's just been ROT-13ed. Really, it says this: > Lojwdzsiju ksqhoaaot nxnyh hnjt wotwuaiquv lixyps faqoon hl xk snpkxlbark > rlty pi wahveugqv pl tewb cirrccht ygxajoiyww yqnq tluvxtfu bztdyubgx > rkyip nwpr ywucbnx nkrszkkqvs pyispjze dfyvyou cdf ovrjab acjpzfzsgr ev > xzlzebk vfsolsaht r apqgqtx hln. Which, I'm sure you'll agree, makes a lot more sense. -- a spammer, ms9 and ph9 on alt.culture.ukc.misc % >> No, they upgraded to Win2k because of administrative and application >> functionality, and because of Microsoft's support and pricing policy. > > Oh, leave them to their ignorant cynicism. It keeps morale up. By the way, there is no God. -- Ian Utting, bmd3 and ph9 on ukc.misc % > >Who knows? Major, Thatcher, Macmillan, Baldwin or for that matter Attlee > >- these leaders were all written off at the outset of their tenures but > >went on to prove their critics wrong by their successes. Oh come on, you have to admire Tim's loyalty to his party... such is it's strength is it that he's prepared to rewrite history in order to convince himself that John Major was a successful Conservative leader. -- tcr1 and Matt D'Cruz on alt.culture.ukc.misc % Subject: Newsgroups Could someone tell me how to post on them... i can't figure it out -- jc26 on ukc.nethelp % > It's got something to do with socks, from what I hear... Just dont forget to wash them from time to time... --Paul --waiting - patiently - again... -- ph9 and Paul Osborne on ukc.nethelp % [in response to another TRP pro-Tory rant] > Perhaps he should go into hollywood script writing? My god... I can see it now: 20th Century Fox presents... a Tim Roll-Pickering Production: MAJOR: THE MOVIE - an all action blockbuster! Starring: BRAD PITT as John JENNIFER LOPEZ as Norma TINA TURNER as the ghost of Empress Thatcher ALAN RICKMAN as the Bastard Portillo JACK NICHOLSON as the Evil Senator Blair MARK WALHBERG as Bill 'Dirk Diggler' Clinton and of course, LEONARDO DiCAPRIO as John's hapless sidekick 'Norm' LaMonte. As the opening scene begins with the funeral pyre of the late Empress Thatcher being blasted off into space, the new Emporer Major already faces a stiff military challenge to his leadership from the Evil Senator Blair. When Blair (Nicholson) crashes through the door of the palace of Number 10, cackling "heeeeeeere's Tony!", can the valiant Major rouse his battered and treacherous forces to victory? Roll-Pickering, fresh from the triple-Oscar winning 'Kent Union: The Musical' lends his typical directorial hand, so expect plenty of car chases, large explosions and endless references to the Conservative Party in 1912, the post-war decline of the Liberals and many other nuggets of political history of no relevence to modern politics. "Outstanding! I loved every minute of it!" - Paul Ross, News of the World. -- bcc3 and Matt D'Cruz on alt.culture.ukc.misc % > Or is it to make everyone aware of where to get the drugs? Obviously the > new freshers will need to be introduced to the appropriate people. Ah, yes. I once got a phone message from a member of this parish (who may be on a year out this year), asking whether I knew where to obtain some of these substances. When I returned the call, and asked him why on earth I should know these things, he insinuated that I must be on something to be as crazy, and, er, far out as I am. I told him to try elsewhere instead. Moof - I may be a lunatic, but I don't need anything to help me with that -- cdl1 and gar2 on ukc.misc % >>> Three cheers for comrade Ducttape. >> Is he your brother, Phil? > Of course he is. All comrades are my brother. (except for > female comrades, who are my sister) Must make the whole 'courtship' thing a bit awkward. -- ptc1, srp3, ptc1 and ph9 on ukc.misc % > I am considering buying a sim card from Genie, but they say that my fone > wont be compatable with their sim card unless I get my fone 'chipped'. > > A). What is chipping. This invloves cutting it into thin strips and deep frying it for a couple of minutes until it is crispy and golden brown. -- sh8 and jc26 on ukc.misc % > I have a feeling we are > going to be seeing a lot more of our Womens Officer this year. Well, I should hope so, after three successive 'increase lighting on campus' campaigns. -- dct1 and ph9 on ukc.misc % > Why don't we just ban all movements around campus after dark? Phil, that's cruel, think of all the people that might have had a bad curry. -- ptc1 and ph9 on ukc.misc % I believe Woodget is still in the Mandela building, because he can't fit his head through the door to get out. -- wa1 on ukc.misc % > oh look, it's down again ... and it's not even raining ;) Chickens are being sacrificed in the machine room at the moment.... -- ms9 and Paul Osborne on ukc.nethelp % > Anyone have their email address, offhand? I have mine. It's srp3. -- ptc1 and srp3 on ukc.misc % > I seem to have a problem with my email. It would seem, computers were not meant for people like u. Try Royal Mail. -- sh8 and ks51 on ukc.misc % > > > I'm looking for 4 more people to start up a Hear'say tribute band... > > Yes, lets hope this is some kind of sick joke. Hmmm, it has a certain ring to it: "Some Kind of Sick Joke - A tribute to Hear'say". -- kmr5, hmjs1 and Nick Shaw on ukc.adverts and ukc.misc % > Which is the best OS? Windows. Brendan Gates -- Tim Roll-Pickering and bmd3 on ukc.misc % Also, it's a known fact that smoking makes you look like a grown-up. For instance, ptc1 is actually only 12 years old, but looks at least 40. -- ph9 on ukc.misc % >> *waves at news admin* > *waves at news admin* *waves at Mafoo and Tim* Go away children and wave your willies somewhere else. -- ms9, Tim Bishop and Paul Osborne on ukc.misc % >>> err, why in the hell did that post twice :/ >> Must be a glitch in the Matrix. > So what was changed? I don't think anything big changed. At least, I can't see any differences. So, anyone up for going to the Venue tonight? -- kmdm2, ph9, kmdm2 and ph9 on ukc.misc % > .....my single 10,000RPM Ultra160 SCSI drive is probably faster. Plus I > can rip audio at 40x with my SCSI CDROM :) Only one? I've just fitted 9 10,000RPM Fibre Channel disks (SCSI is so last millennium) together with a quarter Gig cache raid controller. .25 Tbyte in total. I only got the smallest one - anything more seemed a little extravagant - still, I can always cluster them if I need more space in the future. Anyway, there's always the 28 other disks in the machine if I need a little more space. Haven't thought about XP on it though... Darren - well, pelican is sort of mine :-) -- J.C.Mills and Darren Chapman on ukc.misc % I was wondering whether anyone had any experience with jumping out of aircraft* for charity. I quite fancy the idea and wondered where there are any places that it could be done. Jonathan *preferably with a fully functional parachute. -- jms11 on ukc.misc % > Does anyone have a copy of Windows XP that they would be willing to burn for > me? No, but if you find one I'll happily supply the matches. -- djr20 and ats1 on ukc.misc % Ladeeez and gentlemeeen, announcing the first misc meet of the term. ** Miscmeet #26 - misc invades ukc.netgames ** Here's the deal. We all go and post miscellaneous crap on ukc.netgames. That's it - great huh? Three general guidelines for the meet: 1) No posts about CS, or any other subjects which might be appropriate in that group. Instead, how about lefty-communist protests, religious debates and Onion rants? 2) When questioned on the group about the seemingly off-topic posts, simply reply with complete ignorance of any established or common-sense conventions in UseNet. Suggest that, despite being a sad spod, you don't know the slightest thing about news regs, or the polite decency to follow them. 3) Write all posts as though they are text messages, and therefore limited in size. Abbreviate anything that can be, even where readability is compromised. After all, in UseNet every byte counts, and you don't really know how to spell, anyway. c u thr, m8s Brendan -- bmd3 on ukc.misc % If you are downloading something that is non academic then as long as you have no impact on the service then you should be ok as long as the download is illegal. -- Darren Chapman on ukc.misc % > and bigger boobies (well maybe not than SOME computer scientists) Are you think of Ben Charlton again? :o) -- lrs1 and nar4 on ukc.misc % >> [ Just so you know, they normally start '#!/bin/sh' ] >And then a plumber turns up and gets his wrench out. Schtop! -- ms9, ph9 and Eerke Boiten on ukc.misc (the reference is to a Grolsch advert with a heavily-overplayed Dutch porn director) % > I have recently got my internet connection, however, I am only able to > access local sites on the uni network and no external sites. Plus my network > card is only flashing orange instead of green. What is the problem? Take out the orange LED and replace it with a green one... You may need some soldering equipment. -- csn3 and jc26 on ukc.comp.hardware.pc % Calm yourself and realise there roundabouts to play on and butterflies to catch. Humans like to beat each other up and flex their might (pct1 excluded, naturally). Skip to your lectures in psychology and dance amongst the acorns and conkers. Submit to the greater forces. -- dek3 on ukc.misc % > How would you train the Pigeons? And how many pigeons do you need mer > Megabit? IPoAC isn't too bad for bandwidth; it's the 45-minute latency that's the killer. Not much good for Counterstrike. -- dct1 and ats1 on ukc.nethelp % > Unemployable. Returned to gain better qualification. Fingers crossed. What? Did you cough then saying "fries" or something? -- ph9 and srp3 on ukc.misc % > WE ARE HAVING having the meeting tommorrow at the PARK WOOD THORNDEN > COURT-5 ALL YOU ARE WELCOME PLEASE AT 7:00p.m Maximum in 35 minute you will get your food... -- ma27 and srp3 on ukc.misc % If you're talking about technicalities, then the Union voted itself out of existence at the last Students' Council. The Council voted that F&GPC could deem affiliation to the National Abortion Campaign Ultra-Vires. Deeming something Ultra-Vires to the Union is an act of interpreting the constitution. Therefore, F&GPC can now interpret the constitution..... so, the elected officers of this Union can determine under what rules they work, without check, and without being held to account. The Union is thus totally undemocratic, and vanishes in a puff of logic. -- srp3 on ukc.misc % Welcome to the University of Kent at Canterbury, the premier University in the Garden of England! During your stay here, you will have many exciting opportunites to spend your free time in many different ways! Why not spend your days in the City Centre, mavelling at the majestic Cathedral that, along with some cranes, dominates the city skyline! While away your time in one of the City's many public houses, or go shopping in some of the wide variety of local and High Street shops! In the evening, why not try the Venue - Canterbury's Award Winning student nightclub? Opened in 1998, and with a capacity of over 1200, you're sure to find something - or someone - you like there! In between all of this, if you have time, you can become involved in the Student Union, then jack it all in! Don't forget, too, that Canterbury now has - count 'em - TWO Burger King restaurants, where the whole family can enjoy a meal for less than your overdraft limit! Yes, the Medieval City of Canterbury - It's the place to be! -- srp3 on ukc.misc % > Yes I realise this is a sexist post. No, this is a sexist post: | | | | | | | | See? Looks the same as any other post.... but it's sexist. You can tell by the way it looks at you. -- jac8 and srp3 on ukc.misc % It's at times like these that I sincerely wish I was a member of Steering, just so I could resign. -- bmd3 on ukc.misc % >I passed, :) ok maybe it took me two attempts to pass, but I did pass! No you didn't, you got in because of an unfortunate rounding of your test mark. You complain about people not doing well and pulling down the ratings of the uni, but it's idiots like you doing absolutely sweet FA, not going to lectures or classes, failing miserably, and then complaining that others are bringing the uni down. It's people like you who are the problem James. Either knuckle down and do some work, or shut the hell up. -- jads1 and bcc3 on ukc.misc % I do know that yesterday the doctor "prescribed"[1] me more sex. Which I am not complaining about. Would have been interesting had he printed prescription for it so I could take it to the nice red head in the chemist. [1]He said that the best treatment for my problem was more Sex. -- dif2 on ukc.misc % There are two kinds of people who particularly annoy me. Ignorant people, and stupid people. You're both. No offense intended, of course. -- bd8 on alt.culture.ukc.misc % > Rumour has it that foo has a girlfriend, so I thought it only right and > proper that we give foo an opportunity to dispell these rumours before > things get out of hand. > So, foo, over to you... I really hate the way news travels in this place -- ph9 and ms9 on ukc.misc % >> I wish to share some folders. However in the properties there is no >> sharing tab only a general tab. >> Could someone please tell me how to get the sharing tab. > What OS? Public PC, or SSB? Something a little less abstract might > help... No, he means the IDEA of the 'sharing tab'. Any physical manifestation is purely a deceptive illuson of the real thing. Get out of the cave, Brendan. -- sd36, bmd3 and ptc1 on ukc.misc % You drop the monitor. SysAdmin enters from the South. SysAdmin attacks you! SysAdmin hits you! You lose 40 health. You die. Would you like to start a new degree? (Y/N) -- jac22 on ukc.misc % >I'd hammer in the morning So would I. I'd hammer it in good and proper, to make sure it'd never come out again. -- Claire Morton and bcc3 on ukc.misc % > Subject: Basketball > I'm looking for a partner to train Where's Moof when you need him? > I wanna come back to the game now but I'm bear Again, Moof? > ball-handling warm-up Moof? > one-on-one moves Moof? > and defensive footwork. A kick in the nads for Moof, probably. -- ksp3 and srp3 on ukc.misc % >9:30pm - Break >9:15pm - Second Showing: Spriggan [...] - baka-Nert we have a time machine really, it's powered by schoolgirls running in little wheels away from fake plastic tentacles. really, honest. -- jac22 on animesoc mailing list % > This post was sponsered by Barclay's Bank. This thread is now a trendy wine-bar. -- ph9 and bmd3 on ukc.misc (from a Natwest advert: "My bank is now a trendy wine bar") % I'm beginning to see a pattern, but then I am reading 'Cross-Stitch & Knitwear Monthly'. -- bmd3 on ukc.misc % > actually i believe we have a 155Mb/s microwave connection here. Yup, you can dnld a turkey in 5 seconds. -- lr2 and md27 on ukc.cs.cs1 % >Whats a plonker ? ----------- I I I I I I <---Mirror I I ----------- -- bja3 and prl3 on ukc.misc % >> I bet Tony Blair has a bigger penis than George Bush. >Everything in America is BIGGER than in the UK everyone knows that Ah, we've identified the superstition that stops George Bush from travelling abroad then ... -- ph9, bja3 and Eerke Boiten on ukc.misc % > Just a thought... You are a zit on life's ass. Coming to the miscmeet, though? -- jads1 and bmd3 on ukc.misc % >> So...who here has seen the Harry Potter film, and what did they think of it? > Loved it. > Brought out the little boy in me. > Except I didn't wet the bed. You just left that to the little boy, yeah? -- ph9, bmd3 and ph9 on ukc.misc % > That's right, news admin are evil people who, despite being paid, don't like > people with money. Thats not true Brendan. I dont like anyone money or not. -- bmd3 and Paul Osborne on ukc.misc % >I've just been banned my computer services for, and I quote "posting rubbish". Er? I assume you are discussing my email to you? If so then it was (as I have said in my email to you) a "friendly warning" and a suggestion that you read the regs particularly on swearing and masking. If you want me to make it more formal then fine, I can do that. -- bja3 and Darren Chapman on ukc.misc % > Where's your spirit of adventure? It can't be that hard to grab a copy > of the ed src code and add colour highlighting to it. Ah you pansy! I want to know who to get syntax highlighting when I am using my magnets. -- Chris Keene and Paul Osborne on ukc.comp.lang.java % Why were you clicking 'bout late last night, When I see mon-i-tor glare and a flashing green light; Can anyone bother to quote right, Can you fill me in... That PC is pro-per-ty, Look, it's marked with 'UKC', The mouse ball just, won't come free, Can you fill me in... All they seem to do, Is be locking up on you, baby... Mouse denies your every move, Hope some day service improves, baby... -- srp3 on ukc.test % > The Compsoc LAN Party > Due to some unfortunate alterations: > Keynes Dinning Hall: > Saturday, 1st December, 9am - 11pm > - Extra long power extension cables, so we can tap into power from the other > rooms in the missing link Blimey, they will have to be long ones won't they :o) -- bjt5 and jam12 on ukc.misc % > *tap* *tap* *spout* *soap* *overflow* *plughole* -- kw23 and ats1 on ukc.test % Subject: AnimeSoc Week 10 - "So basically they went 'Hey Lilith, look over there, a 4-assed monkey! *stab*'..." [NS] -- jac22 on animesoc mailing list % I'm anti-war, and I didn't go on the march. Taking me as a sample, that means that 100% of people who didn't go on the march are anti-war, and that they all didn't go because they were running Impro for UKCD at the time. -- bmd3 on ukc.misc % If we really wanted to make the Union rich we'd open a brothel. -- Ben Bristow on ukc.misc % George Trail looked up to the holy smash tin and said: > Oy! Can't you read? [...] Oh, and you appear to be a crappy lecture theatre :P -- glt2 and jc26 on ukc.misc % > I hereby conclude that you can't produce to save your skin. What were you > using as musical elements? Samples of hamsters farting down a length of > garden hose? I'm deeply hurt by your comments, as are Bubble & Squeek. They worked hard for that song, and you toss their efforts aside as though insignificant. Admittedly I had to amplify them - no matter how many beans I fed them, they barely produced enough noise to startle a cat. We didn't use the hose for recording the samples though, just for lighting or enough methane to light. -- bjb1 and bmd3 on ukc.misc % Subject: Re: /dev/beer2 (unix-users meet) Now if you would just cross post this to the BSD newsgroup which I READ... nd not put it on Rock/#1 a drink night at the beercart...... Id be ther ;) Ramsay ps is typing ability rtequirement for attendnce? ;) -- rgt1 on ukc.misc % > > Or indeed, just shout Count. > Why not turn it into a musical number? A great big song and dance, like a > 1930s musical. Go on. I'd go to an AGM that has that. To the tune of a famous south park song: Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel, We shout count cos we shout count the biggest COUNT in the whole wide world it's a stupid count if there ever was a count it's a count of all the boys and girls In UGM we shout count In Council we shout count In All Union events we shout count Then in an AGM, just to be different, we call for a superkinkymegaCount! (et cetera) Or possibly: I am a heavy poster to a newsgroup miscellaneous Who makes quick-witted puns and whose comments are extraneous I feel that many facts in these motions are quite spurious And as to why they should be here, that question I find curious I'm astounded that this farce goes on as our turn out's quite spontaneous And things that are more int'resting I could do simultaneous In other words I'm calling "count"; I have to be a bore you see But I turn unto the chair to declare about our quoracy Tutti: We turn unto the chair to declare about our quoracy We turn unto the chair to declare about our quoracy We turn unto the chair to declare about our quora-quora-cyyyyy How's that? -- gar2, ph9 and gar2 on ukc.misc % Subject: nutritional value of java seminar leaders? Any suggestions? Just that I haven't eaten all day, and I'm stuck in java seminar. :( -- zs2 on ukc.misc % >>> Arsonists of the world, ignite! >> Christians of the world, contrite! > Communists of the world, get together and form a society based on > flawed political ideas that will fail due to the inherent selfishness > of the human race! Sarcastic bastards of the world, shut up! -- bmd3, ptc1. ph9 and ptc1 on ukc.misc % i am going to sell a new condiment called "ROFL mayo". i think geeky people will buy it due to the evident comic genius demonstrated on the label. and i will get very rich and be able to execute my bid to take over the world. -- Ewan Sinclair on alt.culture.ukc.misc % Z13 Printer 1200dpi Accidently bought two instead of one. Selling for the same price (£40). Please Im trying to get rid of it. -- ja21 on ukc.adverts % > Anyone want to buy a "KENT SU GET YOUR ARSE IN GEAR" T-shirt? Not for going to work in, ta. -- dif2 and Ben Bristow on ukc.misc % Misc is optical now? Cool... does that mean there won't be such a build up of crap? -- bmd3 on ukc.misc ("misc" being a typo for "mice") % >>> Christmas is about celebrating the birth of you Lord Jesus Christ and not >>> just an excuse to get drunk. >> Rubbish. Drinking good. What has jesus ever done for us? > The aquaduct? I thought that was John the Baptist? Or am I getting confues with the mini-skirt? -- drm4, bcc3, ph9 and vmf1 on ukc.misc % > often when replying to a post on eg ukc.misc, outlook express tells me that > it can't send the message as there is ''more included text than new text''. > It then sits around in my outbox annoying me. Any ideas? Write more or quote less. -- Joel Segal and Pete Saunders on ukc.comphelp % > Who's Roger Waters? Hey You, when it comes to the Great Gig in The Sky you'll be the Them in "Us and Them". You probably won't be Coming Back to Life though in Time, and with maybe a bit of Money you may become Comfortably Numb as Another Brick in the Wall round Cluster One. Of course, when the Division Bell tolls, it will be a Great Day for Freedom, and if you are Learning to Fly then it'll be "Goobye Cruel World" for you in the Trial. You won't remain In The Flesh, rather you'll be On The Run. Brain Damage will come before the Eclipse, and you'll Wish You Were Here. It doesn't have to be like this. All you need to do is make sure you Keep Talking. So Breathe, Speak To Me. None of this "Is Anybody Out There?" malarkey, or "What Do You want From Me?". It'll be the Happiest Days of Our Lives. Moof - in Sorrow, but with High Hopes -- aejm1 and gar2 on ukc.misc % >> How is listening to someone talk about what they believe and then >> discussing said beliefs with other people considered brainwashing? > It isn't. The bit where they strap you to a table and spin lights in your > face, that's brainwashing. Boo. The church hasn't done that for years. -- ep16, ph9 and bmd3 on ukc.misc % >> Where in the bible does it say 'thou shalt not spank thy neighbour'? > Well, Jesus said that one someone strikes you, you are to offer him the > other cheek. This is blatantly stating that all Christians should be > masochists, and thus, by implication, they cannot be sadists. So > spanking of neighbours is right out. Yes, but along the same lines, but giving the opposite message in terms of sadomasochism ... : Proverbs 25:22 For thou shalt heap coals of fire upon [thine enemy's] head, and the LORD shall reward thee. -- ph9, gar2 and Eerke Boiten on ukc.misc % so do you need a TV licence to cross dress? Do they have 5 0'clock shadow detector vans and stuff? :-D -- md27 on ukc.misc % > can we assume that 4 => 4 => 4 => 4 =>........ is a run? No, a run is at least 3 consecutively numbered cards. -- aa45 and jlr6 on ukc.cs.cs2 (talking about temporal logic) % > > > Why is the word "stutter" so difficult to say? > > and why is 'dyslexia' so hard to spell? And why is 'phonetic' not spelt the > > way it sounds? > And why is 'Americanisation' spelt with an S? And why is 'abbreviation' such a long word? -- gar2, ph9, Tim Roll-Pickering and jac22 on ukc.misc % speaking of heatsinks and all that, i've been trying to think of things to overclock, anyone got any funky suggestions? a motorway would be classic (change the speed limit signs and hax0r the cameras and traffic lights on the inlets), and my watch is a bit of a must, because then i can claim i'm so l33t that time passes faster for me :-). -- Ewan Sinclair on alt.culture.ukc.misc % > You have a corporation ? No, he is a corporation. Many miscers are actually large companies pretending to be students for tax purposes. pseudoGeek is actually a car import company with a sideline in weapons smuggling, and la haine is a firm of left-handed photojournalists who work for various publications on a contract basis. I myself am an international standard for the manufacture of genetically-modified herrings. -- lba2 and drm3 on ukc.misc % About a month ago I got a lunatic phonecall - it was 1am and I was in bed just about to drop off to sleep. I slowly became aware that the phone was ringing, I was alone in the house and it must have been going at least a minute before I got out of bed... I finally reach the phone, downstairs in the front room, mumble "'Lo?" into the handset, and an anguished, haunted, half-crazed voice answers: "HELP ME! I'VE GOT MY PHONE STUCK UP MY ARSE!" ...and rings off. This was not funny at the time. -- drm3 on ukc.misc % > Agreed - some of my best friends I've met online first, then IRL. Oh man, existence has been abbreviated. -- bcc3 and bmd3 on ukc.misc % > > Yeah, it's fake - he does actually wank. > whats that got to do with the price of tea in china? Not masturbating reduces sales of FHM and Loaded, which push up the publishing costs. This additional cost is passed on to the paper production, and to the shipment of paper. Much of the material for glossy mags is imported, and so the cost of shipment increases. The knock on effect from this increases the cost of primary export goods generally, and for a country like China, where tea is the primary export, the cost increases locally to remain competitive abroad. And so the price of tea in China goes up. It's all part of the web of tightly interlinked global economics. -- srp3, jads1 and bmd3 on ukc.misc % Oh it is, brain the size of a planet and all they tell me to do is misc... -- zs2 on ukc.misc % > Can you drink in the library ? Yes, but you're not allowed to - though it does depend on which sign you read. Some signs say "no eating and drinking" and some say "no eating or drinking". If you're by the first kind, you can either eat or drink but not both. -- lba2 and aejm1 on ukc.misc % The Miscmas Song (To the tune of The Christmas Song [Chestnuts roasting on an open fire etc.]) Nimrod roasting on an open fire; DuctTape wearing women's clothes. Misc-tide greetings being typed by some nerds, And top-posters that everybody loathes... Everybody knows a spodmeet and an argument Will help to make the newsgroup bright. Flamers in asbestos with their pilot lights aglow, Will help to set pillocks alight... They know that admin's on his way, He's loaded lots of BW's and Seemes for today, And every miscing one is going to spy, To see if Baad and Nimrod's accounts are gonna fry. And so I'm offering this simple phrase, To Miscers who know what to do. Merry Miscmas to you. They know that admin's on his way, He's loaded lots of BW's and Seemes for today, And every miscing one is going to spy, To see if Baad and Nimrod's accounts are gonna fry. And so I'm offering this simple phrase, to Miscers who know what to do. Although it's been grepped, many times many ways, Merry Miscmas, Merry Miscmas, Merry Miscmas, Toooooo yooooou! Merry Misc/Christmas, everyone! -- Richard Bellingham on ukc.misc % > > But our modern celebration is, despite these things, still all about > > Christ. > Yes, and Easter *really is* still all about the Resurrection, and not about > chocolate. Well, you see, the easter bunny is representative of the bunnies who lived in the warren into which the cross was stuck, and the chocolate is brown, just as the wood from the cross was brown, and we have eggs because they threw eggs at christ while he was in the cross and.... -- ms9, ph9 and gar2 on ukc.misc % >>> Subject: Re: Christ is Still in Chritmas! >> Melanie - All hail Chrit! > Works for me. Do we get many holidays? Well, Chritmas is the big one, clearly. But there's also Ester, Shove Tuesday (if anyone's got a good recipe for pncake batter I'd appreciate it) and Epihany. Apparently some American Chritians celebrate Tanksgiving, although obviously you have to be careful to whom you give the tanks these days. Adam "I'm a Caholic myself" Sampson -- ms9, mm3, bcc3 and ats1 on ukc.misc % as soon as i got back (literally) today i dropped my phone down the loo and then cracked the screen after hitting it in a fit of pique. does anyone have, or know where i can get, a nokia 3330 (or thereabouts) that i can put my sim card in and pretend this sorry experience never happened?preferably quite cheap., though i would be willing to pay in the form of money, lager, or teabags. -- srd4 on ukc.adverts % > sysadmin@ukc.ac.uk ne marche pas (en ce moment...) > Est-ce le bon email ? Non. Vous doivez utiliser . Et la plume de ma tante est sur la chaise de ma tante. > sysadmin@ukc.ac.uk doesn't work (tonight...) > Is it the correct email ? Nope. As far as correctness goes, it's right off. You might find that a little prod in the general direction of would work. > sysadmin@ukc.ac.uk funkzionniert nicht (diese Nacht) > Ist es das richtig email ? Nein. > sysadmin@ukc.ac.uk !$!@$% !^&*% (!#* >{}:") > @!*#^&%!@ *$(#%$)#$ }{][0q(*#@$ ? perling that produces: Array found where operator expected at -e line 1, at end of line Array found where operator expected at -e line 1, at end of line (Missing operator before ?) syntax error at -e line 1, near "sysadmin@ukc" Execution of -e aborted due to compilation errors. Execution of -e aborted due to compilation errors. Might it work if you tried cs-sysadmin? -- dsla2 and gar2 on ukc.cs.conv-msc % Subject: Its a test.... Question 1) 2 + 4 = ? Question 2) Name 3 Beatles tracks written by George Harrison Question 3) Show that the following holds A ^ B => B ^ A -- cfw3 on ukc.test % Someone has left a CD in "Woody" in the multimedia lab. It has music on it such as David Gray and Bryan Adams, and as such was not worth stealing. So if you've lost it, now you know. By the way, I want compensation for having to listen to 7 seconds of Bryan Adams. -- mrf4 on ukc.misc % > oh there are bits in the {} for it to do something, umm I just thought it > might not be such a peachy idea to put it in the cs2 newsgroup, ;)! James Don't worry I don't think many people will copy you ;o) -- jads1 and nar4 on ukc.cs.cs2 % Okay, I'm upgrading my cpu and motherboard to a 1000MHz Duron on a microATX board (so it still fits into my desktop pc's case). My current power supply unit is gives the board 240 volts - do I need a higher voltage (say 300 V)? -- asw3 on ukc.comphelp % Subject: Haiku What is this Z thing? I didn't go to Lectures. One week 'til deadline. -- jc26 on ukc.cs.cs2 % Subject: 15' Philips monitor for sale good working condition monitor selling for about GBP45 (negotiable) -- cht2 on ukc.adverts (I suspect he meant 15"...) % >> i have forgotten my password. Does anyone know who I need to contact to get >> it. > email cs-sysadmin@ukc.ac.uk and ask nicely Ask very nicely. I can't believe 147 people managed to loose their password! -- rnjp2, gjd2 and Tim Bishop on ukc.cs.cs1 % > I like a bit of dressing up, but it's the drooling drunk men I can't stand Then you'll have to wear something less revealing next time, won't you. -- tcc2 and drm3 on ukc.misc % >> Is Sam Osborne really half-chinese? > Dunno, but you are half Romany aren't you? Only the bottom half. -- ph9, Kevin Marsh and ph9 on ukc.cs.conv-msc % > Microsoft is comming to get you ! > We're comming to get you, > We're comming to get you, : : > We're comming to get you, > We're comming to get you, Doesn't Outlook Express have a spellchecker? -- "Bill Gates" and md27 on ukc.misc % >> what happened to it? > I got way laid. Yeah? Was she way good? -- sg6, Paul Osborne and ph9 on ukc.nethelp % Speaking of the keepers of the digital flame at UKC, I had a rather odd dream the other night that Paul Osborne got my car removed from a car park and wouldn't give it back. then i went to see him (he was working in a 1st world war stylee trench inside a giant building not unlike st pancras train station at a workstation for some reason) and he was most resolute about keeping it for several years and actually quite nasty about it, although i may have lost my head about it a little, but given the circumstances i thought that was fair enough. that was a little on the odd side. i'll stop talking now and go to take some of those nice little pills they've given me..... -- Ewan Sinclair on alt.culture.ukc.misc % >When someone says, go find who you really are, Find yourself. What do they >really mean? "Sod off and leave me alone" -- dif2 and bcc3 on alt.culture.ukc.misc % > Do we have a lecture in the 10am slot this week? 10:00 Wonder why the alarm is set so early. 10:02 Open an eye and throw a shoe into the clock. 10:05 Move a foot out from the bed with the strong intention to get up, check the newsgroups, have a shower, breakfast, go to the PC room, print the latest slides and be on time for the next lecture. 10:51 Open two eyes, curse loudly and fall on the floor. 10:52 Go to the bathroon. Notice the light switches on automatically when opening the door. 10:53 Notice that you are in the kitchen and that the fridge doesn't contain any soap. 10:54 Go to the bathroom, take the soap, open the shower, brush your teeth. 10:55 Notice that the toothpaste doesn't foam and the soap tastes ugly. 10:56 Go out of the shower, dry, find some clothes. 10:57 Find the last sock between "Java first contact" and "Networks make me happy". 10:58 Wear an underwear, a pair of trousers, shirt, shoes... 10:59 Rush out of the house. 11:00 Notice that 11:58's order was compulsory. Hide the underpant in the pocket. 11:01 Run. 11:03 Wonder why you arrive at the pub. Go back. 11:10 Arrive at the lecture theatre, try to get your breathe back. Sit quietly. 11:11 Wonder which module deals with the new onthological studies of social behaviours in the Kamtchaka peninsula. 11:12 Leave the room quietly. 11:13 Login to the network in the PC room. 11:45 Finished loading your profile, load outlook express. 11:47 Read the newsgroups. Check the date. Reread the newsgroups. Recheck the date. 11:48 Curse loudly. Logout. 11:59 Back to bed. 12:15 Finished saving your profile. -- ph9 and dsla2 on ukc.cs.conv-msc % > Intelligent Male From what I've heard, this is debateable. As to which word is the more debateable of the two, I'm not entirely sure... -- dif2 and Atuin on alt.culture.ukc.misc % >like the subject says... any news? cos I'm off campus and have no way of >finding out... can anyone view ukc.misc? The loudmouth one who thinks he's popular won President. The one who's always in the Venue with a Sports Fed top on won Treasurer. The lesbian won women's officer, although Wyatt came second. The one everyone's scared of won Sports fed. Comms was won by someone with a sad little 'fanclub' The geeky one got Equal Opps. And no-one cares who won the rest. -- ajc9 and Steve Wright on alt.culture.ukc.misc % Flush my buffer baby, and pass my parameter, loop your method body around my diameter, Concatenate, then tokenise my String, your Java lovin' will speed up my ping. Initialize my variables, view my source code, give me some good values then switch to ex mode. If (you want my output && you like my class) { System out printline(" come and get my........")} Get graphic with my GUI, sort my array Implement my interface,don't stop till I say. Root in my directory, then save me to file You can do it baby compile compile compile! -- cfw3 on ukc.cs.conv-msc % > As in students' interests are to be represented by someone sufficiently blind > to the feelings and work of others that he speeds around park wood in a car > with a megaphone yelling his t**s off disturbing people working? Just for > his personal ambition... That's a good thing? Thank God I graduate this > year... That's alright... he's been elected now, which means you never need hear from him again :) -- ds19 and Matt D'Cruz on alt.culture.ukc.misc % Ok this is a hypothetical question about a hypothetical situation in which i have a hypothetical assignment in for this friday.... -- pw3 on ukc.cs.cs1 % Hi there, I'm interested for your car. Let me know time and place. By the way, I'm doing Electronics as well. -- ds39 on ukc.adverts % It was decided to advertise a Hentai weekend next year, and to either just waltz in ten minutes late and take pictures of the losers that turn up, or spend all day showing hard Yaoi series. -- gar2 on animesoc committee mailing list % Actual drugs are almost as effective as Excel Saga. -- jac22 on animesoc mailing list % > Now, what is a highly original Excuse these days? [highly original excuse snipped] Of course, this was a draft, as you so rightly point out, but the reason the original file went missing is a much more unlikely story involving a bottle of olive oil, some clothes pegs, the Sultanate of Brunei, and the BA London Eye. I feel that this other excuse was slightly more believable than the reason I lost the file, plus I've probably bored you enough already. Can I have an extension please? -- dif2 and gar2 on ukc.misc % > At least the news server is still going... :o) Yep, they probably have an huge industrial UPS to keep the thing running even during a holocaust, just incase someone needs to post something about "did anyone hear that big bomb explode?". :) -- srp3 and Nick Shaw on ukc.misc % Word is what kicked off the software industry, nay, the world as we know it! Need proof? I refer you to The Gospel according to St. John, Chapter 1, verses 1 and 2. -- gar2 on alt.culture.ukc.misc % > Subject: CAR > FOR SALE Ah, a more discerning kind of seller, looking for just the right kind of customer. Is it demographics? Is it that readers of ukc.test are more likely to to be able to (a) afford a car and (b) want to buy one? Is it the fact that we ukc.test readers are psychic enough to be abel to tell that it's an M-Reg Renault Passat with built-in climate control? Ormaybe, because we're all gentlemen and ladies here, it's the fact that we don't talk about such base things as money, leaving your accountant to talk to our accountant, and assume that a suitable level of remuneration will be achieved? -- Christine Seale and gar2 on ukc.test (the full version of the advert was later reposted -- to ukc.service...) % > Well the hip bone she had was only about 7 years old, perhaps it could > be re-used. NEWS: Queen Mum's hip bone given starring role in "Terminator 3: House of Windsor", a story about a dysfunctional family whose son turns out to be the saviour of several species of Hydrangea - it is him that the hip, built into Arnold Swarzenegger's backpack, must find and attempt to save from the evil claws of "Thatchertron", who has a non-speaking part. -- Karla Parussel and srp3 on alt.culture.ukc.misc % OK further investigation that most of the damage was by one of the users on the SSB. An account has been pulled and the SSB caches are now denying a particular UKC ip address. Since we will need a break in service to allow the IP address again, it may take a while as we would need to book the machines for downtime... :-) -- Paul Osborne on ukc.nethelp, after an ssbcache outage % Revise for exams. If I could offer you only one tip for the future, revision would be it. The long-term benefits of revision have been proved by exam results, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now. Enjoy the power and beauty of Java. But never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of Java until it has been superceded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at the Car Hire assessment and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility the language contained, and how fabulous it really was. It is *not* as silly as you imagine. -- ph9 on ukc.cs.conv-msc, "Everybody's Free (To Revise)" % Don't worry about the summer project. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to construct a GridBagLayout by eating a month-old creme egg. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday. Revise one thing every day that *scares* you. *compile* Don't be reckless with other people's HCI mark. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours. *trace* Don't waste your time on logic. Sometimes you're q, sometimes you're ¬q. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with Howard Bowman. -- ph9 on ukc.cs.conv-msc, "Everybody's Free (To Revise)" % Remember good marks you receive. Forget the bad ones. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how. Keep your old java programs. Throw away your old Information Systems notes. *CLIPS* Don't feel guilty if you don't know what any of your networks notes mean. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what their networks notes meant - some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know *still* don't. Get plenty of caffeine. Enjoy your pre-term java classes. You'll miss them when they're gone. Maybe you'll pass, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have a distinction, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll be a lecturer at 40, maybe you'll dance at the SU Summer Ball after your 75th graduation ceremony. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's. -- ph9 on ukc.cs.conv-msc, "Everybody's Free (To Revise)" % Enjoy PFE. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own. Draw class diagrams, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room. Read the assignments, even if you don't follow them. Do not ask Daniel what his coursework marks are, they will only make you feel *stupid*. Get to know your tutor - you never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your classmates. They're your best chance of understanding Compiling Techniques, and the people most likely to stick with you when the test marks come in. -- ph9 on ukc.cs.conv-msc, "Everybody's Free (To Revise)" % Understand that seminars come and go, but there are a precious few you should actually go to. Work hard to bridge the gap between studying and sleeping, because the longer the course goes on for, the more you'll realise you need the people who stayed awake from the beginning. Study in the Java Lab once, but leave before it makes you nerdy. Study in Keynes Computer Room once, but leave before it makes you die of old age waiting to login. *grep* Accept certain inalienable truths: Assignments will get harder, lecturers will hand marks back late. You, too, will develop nervous tics. And when you do, you'll fantasise that when you were an undergraduate, assignments were easier, lecturers were quicker to mark, and students respected their seminar leaders. Respect *your* seminar leaders. -- ph9 on ukc.cs.conv-msc, "Everybody's Free (To Revise)" % Don't expect anyone else to help you. Maybe you have a VI tutorial. Maybe you have a degree in logic. But you never know when either one might suddenly turn out to be obsolete. Don't mess too much with your DCG or by the time you reach sentence 40 it will look like sentence 85. Be careful whose notes you buy, but be patient with those who sell them. Notes are a form of charity. Selling them is a way for lecturers to earn a little extra money, copying images from old books, painting over the ugly parts, and passing them on for more than they're worth. But trust me on the revision. -- ph9 on ukc.cs.conv-msc, "Everybody's Free (To Revise)" % > Well the day has finally arrived. I'd like to say Good Luck everyone > and I hope the revision pays off and you get the marks you deserve. And just remember, everyone, that if you do badly on this exam, then it will reflect upon you for the rest of your life and you'll never, ever, get the job that you want. -- nar4 and ph9 on ukc.cs.cs2 % > Does anyone else feel slightly disconcerted that these exams are going to > change the course of our lives forever? no second chances, either you do > well or you fail miserably and are doomed not to get a job ever... Believe it or not, employers aren't only looking for academia. However, they're not looking for advanced moaning or warez skills either, so maybe you should worry. -- jads1 and jlr6 on ukc.cs.cs2 % > ...Oh well, there goes my distinction. cheer up Brendan, you can have mine if you like, I think I threw it away one hour in... -- bmd3 and ph9 on ukc.cs.conv-msc, talking about an exam % > Subject: Thanks > For the truly excellent connection/service over the past couple of years. So James, how many CDs did you burn during the easter vacation this time? -- jads1 and Paul Osborne on ukc.nethelp % People often underestimate the value of 'blagging' in history. Blagging managed to get me through all 3 years of a history degree, often managing to hand in essays without actually referring to any books at all. As far as I can tell, if you can get 3 actual and recognisable facts into an essay, then you're sorted. There are some interesting things to consider. Firstly, if you have a young seminar leader, then they will often freely admit that they don't know everything about the module. Because of that admission, you can happily slip incorrect facts into your essay - as long as they sound plausible, and you can make up a reference, you'll usually be taken as knowing what you're talking about and they won't bother checking up. Furthermore, one should never underestimate the value of footnotes. Footnotes allow you to pad out an essay without actually ever introducing any relevant content into the essay. Historians love anecdotes, or anything that will make an essay more interesting to read, so you can easily add another 500 words to your score by going off on a tangent. In the body of an essay, you would lose marks instantly for going off-topic, but in a footnote, it's easily acceptable. I once handed in an essay that, on one page, had more footnotes than actual essay, and I got a very good mark for it. -- ph9 on ukc.courses.history % > Theres no sound coming out of my sound card, Usually the sound comes from the speakers connected to the sound card ;-) -- lbja2 and pjo2 on ukc.comphelp % > why the umm why on earth are you posting on a UKC newsgroup if you are in > Spain? I have the ability to teleport myself to various locations in the world at will, thus allowing me to perform my varied public and secret duties with a minimum amount of time wastage. I also have a global internet connection (which comes in really useful in Namibia, Jerusalem, and the backward country Spain, which has no internet capability whatsoever) implanted into my brain, which is used purely for academic purposes and for relaying whatever I see back to the GADGET HQ. I use the neurocannula for porn and warez. Of course, as an aid to me knowing where I am and what language I should be speaking (I can currently speak in 39, including Hungarian, Basque, and Java) I display my current location on my retinas as a matter of course, using the military-spec GPS decoder implanted next to my third kidney, and I automatically feed this information through to my .sig generator as I trapse aroudn the place. Wait a moment, I just need to complete this delivery... -- jads1 and gar2 on ukc.nethelp % It's an interesting fact that most of the elderly history lecturers actually never see the sunlight, and instead exist soley in Rutherford, only reaching other places on campus via a network of tunnels. This is because, as Steve points out, if the sunlight were to strike them, all their decades of accumulated knowledge would instantly evaporate into the air, and they would instantly become young, strong, healthy men, with no knowledge of history. And yes, I include the women in this. -- ph9 on ukc.courses.history % This week in testing.... win2k03 has been upgraded to win2k06....well nothing really, its probably just a pre release to win2k08.....where we are hoping the wrong e-mail address bug will finally be fixed HeLIFire's shift key is still playing up and we are hoping for a new keyboard for him VERY soon Dr Power's literary skills are improving, and he has managed to write the whole title of his book down...however the story still needs a lot to be desired. Paul Haine has not only stated using Outlook Express (as has big BennyC), he has also started top posting and missing irony. However in more tragic news, we hear that la_haine will be with us for another three years (potentially) and he has seriously screwed up Christmas dinners, that the Northern Norse is thinking of trying.... And finally I have no more exams I've been Fox, Thank you for reading, tune in again next week for more exciting happenings in ukc.test, till then Good Night -- nar4 on ukc.test (summarising the week's posts) % > I am pleased to announce (before Paul gets the chance to do it himself) > my engagement to Sarah Pregnant, is she? -- ms9 and ph9 on ukc.cs.cs2 % >> On another matter, is it possible to switch between Linux and Windows i.e >> having those 2 OS run side by side? > Not exactly, but you could try WINE I reeeealy want to switch between Linux and Windows right nooooow. It's so unfaaaaair. -- dmls2, L.Boardman and bmd3 on ukc.nethelp % > The full-stop is your friend, ducttape. Wow! I have a friend! -- ph9 and dif2 on ukc.nethelp % Hello, i am Goosetape, in no way related to Ducttape Who is setting off the fire alarms in Keynes? G M.U.F.F Diving Instructor, blah blah blah All my views are being imposed on you, i believe i am perfect. "On misc be like piss, get everywhere, and respond to every post like an annoying fool" -- dc9 on ukc.misc (parody of dif2's sig) % I have 1997 Toshiba CDS 300 Satellite, which though it is an antique, works very well indeed, when it works. [...] It runs Windows 98, though not perfectly for reasons I will divulge only in private. [...] The computer has a damaged monitor (grey strip across the top) [...] It also has a dodgy hard drive controller, as this was replaced by a guy in Exeter, in July 2000. [...] THE PROBLEM I NEED FIXING IS THAT THE KEYBOARD APPEARS TO BE BROKEN. [...] I tried using an external PS2 keyboard, via the mouse/Ps2 port, but it didn't work, and the USB port doesn't work either, as a result of motherboard damage. -- gpm2 on ukc.adverts (odd definition of "works very well"...) % > For those of you coming to the misc meet, Look for the bright yellow Coat. ... aim and fire :P -- dif2 and jc26 on ukc.misc % > ARrrrrrgghh!!! > WIll all the people I know STOP GETTING MARRIED!!! Sorry. I promise I won't do it again. -- "Axeman" and Steven Wright on alt.culture.ukc.misc % This has very little to do with the content of that article at all, but yesterday on the Channel 5 site there was a news ticker headline reading "Should camp refugees be let in?" and now my head is filled with images of mincing Kosovans going "shut that door"... -- Matt D'Cruz on alt.culture.ukc.misc % People on this course can be put into 10 groups: Those that understand binary and those that don't. -- aws2 on ukc.cs.conv-msc % Subject: Wanted Dinner Jacket 38" chest, 32" waist 34" inside leg -- G.M.Tardivel on ukc.adverts % >What exactly is a Java Certification Voucher ? It's like a certificate you carry around, so when you're finally certified insane, they know it's because of java, and as such to never ever let you out. It's for the good of society. -- jm47 and bcc3 on ukc.cs.cs3 % In a way, I'd agree with you here. There are too many people in the world like Miss Piggy off Big Brother that are allowed to procreate. The only way round this problem is NOT compulsory sterilization, but a simple electronic implant which induces extruciating pain when the word "sumpfink" is uttered. You'd be amazed at the improvement in civilisation... -- md27 on alt.culture.ukc.misc % > I've stayed in the one at Cranfield University's Cranfield Campus. Well, it would be strange to 'stay in one' at Cranfield University's Bogota Campus. -- Tim Roll-Pickering and ms9 on ukc.misc % What is this post about ? Well I could go on and be pretentious and condescending about, the fact that the Campus Shop doesn't sell Caviar, there isn't any antique furniture in seminar rooms, UKC T-shirts are not designer labels, there's no executive gold club seating in any of the dining halls, no waiters or waitresses either, the menus aren't in FRENCH !, how some students need elocution lessons, the UKCH staff are not subservient enough, and they don't call you "Sir" or "Madam", the lack of valet parking, maids, room service, some guy who cleans your car, the Porter should be more like a Concierge, the way some students dress like peasants, the fact that UKCH staff uniforms should be more like those of the staff of a five star hotel, there isn't a golf course on campus, a swimming pool, stables, clay pigeon shooting, hunts, thick carpets, gold leaf, classic architecture, paintings, more security so the locals can't drive along the university roads and get in my way, signs politely telling the public to "piss off", why do buses enter campus ? who are they for ? why hasn't campus got landscaped gardens ? These are all valid and important points. So what did I decide to say ? That is intelligent, well informed, scintillating, admirable, etc Well, last night I shagged GF a couple of times and it was GREAT :) ! -- lbja2 on ukc.misc %